yall was gettin screwed but you wasnt getting kissed

so now that the house is empty (as empty as it can get with me pandy four dogs and four cats) and xmess is over i am back in semagic (which i need to update) and am trying to bust my broken ass to get things back in order and make the house livable and functional again. my printer is out of ink on three carts so i have been using a dry erase board for my tododo lists. i like it for the ease of adding and removing but dont like it for the lack of record keeping. but its better then nothing because if it doesnt get written down i dont usually get it done. one of the problems with the dry erase board is that daily things (dinner, dishes, etc etc) take up too much space. i may fix this with a handful of paper key tags i aquired some where. another problem is that i moved it a week or so ago and this caused a change in pen color but several of the old colored things are still on there.

i dont like that but since i am fighting against time money meds my broke ass and depression i am surprised anything ever gets done. this is why i need the record keeping. on bad days it helps me to see that some things have actually gotten done. of course on those same days i look at the list of what didnt and what still needs to get done and hyperfocus on those. at some point i need to track down my master list and see where that stands. i know that needs edited as i have discovered more things wrong with the house and come across new ideas and projects. i have to have all these lists because i half to keep myself from getting board because when i get board i get dangerous. that is why the master list. some of the stuff is moving around. some of it is sitting at the computer. some of it requires leaving the house. but all of it is destractions to keep me from snuffing it.

one of the trival but big things on the list is putting in the new sound card. still. once this is done i will be able to both the candyass execution stuff and project hell. never minding the fact that the candyass execution stuff is filed under project hell and also for get that once project hell is done it will be a complete go ahead for snuffing it. but not to worry. it is not called project hell because it will get done in five minutes. it wouldnt even get done in five months if i worked on that alone 24 hours a day. frankly i dont really think it will ever get done as long as i am even partially functional.

it would be easy to work on this stuff right now since the only thing i am currently taking for the back pain is otc. that kinda kills the go get em. this with the fact that the lithium that i am currently taking for depression cause my eyeballs to flutter and twitch sporadically. on the other hand the seizures have declined since getting off the depakote/zoloft/wellbutrin coctail. its a good thing but man the seisures pack an awesome buzz. and like anything else with a good buzz it kills brain cells each time it happens. and i never had that many to begin with.