empallin | (no subject)

When I was in high school some friends and I end up at this party. It was at the house of a dj for a local classic rock station. I forget how we found out but ass I remember one of our group were friends with her. We had started out as a group of five or six early in the day so it must have been a saturday. When we decided we were going to go one of the guys and I went to my moms house so I could change clothes. On the way back to the house where the rest of the group was we found an video tape that was a little wet but unmarked. We thought about it and figured it would dry out by the time we got to the party and we could find out what was on it at that time. So we get back to house and found out one of the others had swipe some coke from her parents. This was turning out to be an interesting night. I was seventeen at the time but I was not bug into drinking, unlike some of my peers. The only time I ever had alcohol was the few sips my parents let my have a kid, so that I could see how bad it tasted and shut up.For this, I was a little awkward when I asked what I wanted, so I opted for the peach scnapps eveyone else seemed to be taking. And then we put the tape in. Yeah, it was porn. The first part of it was a little beat up, like it had been taped over a few times. It turned out to contain 3 movies; "Ginger on the Rocks", "On Golden Blonde" and another that I don't remeber the name of. I have always been awkward around groups of people so it was a no surprise to get busted on when it was realized after the tape watching that I had not finised my drink. So I did what I thought was the best thing and downed it as quick as possible and went and got another. All of us high school kids ended up laying on a four poster in the bed room basically just bullshiting. I found a lighter and started jokingly tring to set the bed on fire. Well Diane thought I was really going to do it and wanted her lighter back. I wasn't giving it up, until she bit me in the middle of my back. I had 2 shirts and a jacket on but she bit hard enough that I had a scare from that for some time. It was shortly realized that there were only a couple of beers left and the liquor stores would be closing soon. So I was givin the money and Diane wass sent to find someone to buy it for us. As it turned out we only had enough for 2 12-packs. I don't know how true that was because I never bothered to count how much money I had. So this guy and Diane and I go to this store maybe half a mile a way and get our beer. She and I sat in the car talking about her boyfriend Steve while this guy is inside buying. We drive back to the house and sit in the car drinking and then I realize he has started fingering her. I sit there staring at the screwdriver he has for a car key but thinking about the fact that she is barely 17 while he is hard on pushing 30. I finish my beer, open another and throw one in my pocket. I go inside to get a cigarette from someone. I get it and Nicole asks me where Diane is. I tell her that her and the scumbag are in the car and so is the beer but she doesn't want to go there. I tell her I am going for a walk and hand her the beer I put in my pocket.She triesto talk my outof my walk buy reminding me I am 17 and caring a beer. I tuck it up the sleeve of my trench coat and tell her that it will be ok. of course Ionly half way beleived that myself. I ended up only walking around the block, but when ever I got back no onee was in the car. I was thinking that the host talked some reason into them or something, but Nicole points in the direction of some cars right as the guy was pulling himself up off the ground. I sit there just kinda shaking my head and laughing a sad laugh. I decide I should go inside while Nicole goes and checks on Diane. Right as I walkin the host flips the light on and yells out that the party is over. So I grab the video tape and walk back out the door. I end ip holding the door open as someone is carring Diane inside. Nicole say something about being careful because she is bottomless, if you know what she means. Once they get her inside she says she fine, wants to pull up her undies and has to go pee. So the guy carring her sats here down but she falls down on the hosts records. The hosts really starts sceaming as I help someone else pick her up and get her to the bathroom. We gat her in there and sat down on the toliet and just stare for a moment. I say I am staying here incase she needs some help or something. I didn't even know what I was saying. A smart remark later and the door shuts. I take a seat in the corner, close my eyes and just wait. I was both trying to figure out what happened and covince myself that I wasn't there. I was knocked out of it by the toilet flush. Diane was standing. The says goes "uhh" and turns to vomit. She did not vomit that much but stayed there with her head on the toilet. I went back to my thoughts. I had actually thought she had passed out when she calls my name. And the short conversation was burned forever in my mind.
"Allin?
What?"
Allin, don't you ever get sick of being a nice guy?
"What do you mean?"
"I mean you're always so nice but you know....."
"yeah I know"
"well..."
"No. No I don't"
and then pouding on the door. Nicole was reminding us the party is over because the host is still screaming and has to go to work in a few hours. I tell her Diane is sick. She goes and gets some help and they load her into the back up a truck. They tell me to get in. 'No thanks I am going to walk.' 'Come on. get in' 'No. I really have to go for a walk' 'ok. Be careful.' And so I walked. And I walked.